Like a good movie or play a successful negotiation consists of some crucial elements, which ideally, run in order. These steps or phases are:
• Preparation
• Building Rapport
• Gathering of Information
• Probing & Exploring Options
• Bartering/Trading Concessions
• Finalisation or tying it down
Let’s briefly discuss each element in turn:
Preparation:
This should never be underestimated. At the very least you should have done some research on the other party to the negotiation and understand more about who they are and what’s important to them. This is critically useful information for phase 5 – Bartering /Trading Concessions. You should also be clear on what your strategies are and what it is you will and won’t trade along with what your desired outcomes are. Your outcomes will likely consist of a number of options including the identified point at which you walk away from the negotiations because they are no longer win win.
Building Rapport:
In essence building rapport is about getting in “harmony” or “in sync” with the other person(s). It is about reducing differences and optimising the sameness between us and the other person(s) so that they feel comfortable and ready to interact.
There are numerous NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) techniques for establishing rapport. They include “pacing”; “matching”; “mirroring”; and “leading”.
An explanation of these terms is beyond the scope of this article. However NLP is very useful skill set to have although with it comes the responsibility to use that skill in an ethical and non-manipulative manner.
For those interested in learning more about NLP I refer you to a book by Nicholas Boothman titled, “How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or less.” And for those wanting to do further studies in this area I recommend Christopher Howard Group of Companies.
Gathering of Information:
In truth you are gathering information all the time before, during and even after the conclusion of a successful negotiation. Why? Well the more relevant information you know about the other party the better your ability to establish rapport and build a longer lasting relationship that may lead to repeat business.
Never look at a negotiation process as only a single event. Always think in terms of the bigger picture.
Probing & Exploring Options
This can be a fun part of the negotiations where nothing is off the table and importantly no one is making any commitments just yet.
The trap for young players is they get too enthusiastic too quickly and think they can close out a deal fast when in fact the games have not yet even begun.
You may have experienced such lines in previous negotiations such as, “I’m not saying I could do this, but if I could somehow arrange it how would you feel about…..?”
Or “Well Mr Smith, that’s very interesting. Let me ask you…..if I could organise…..will you…..”
It’s important to be crystal clear on what you are looking for from this phase.
And what do you think that is?
It’s about getting clarity around whether there is scope for the parties to potentially do business together.
It is important to remain relaxed, composed and to maintain one’s “positioning” or “posture” during this phase. To not do so could jeopardize the whole negotiation process.
Bartering/Trading Concessions
Let the games begin. This is where a whole heap of techniques are used by one or both parties (dependant on their respective skill levels) to arrive at an optimal outcome. Ideally this outcome should be a win win – where both parties feel happy about the result. More will follow on specific negotiation techniques in a future article.
Finalising it or tying it down
Beware of being too loose and sloppy with your paperwork.
Whilst I am a trusting individual I am a firm believer in ensuring that key elements of any deals struck are outlined in a document that is at the very least exchanged and signed by all parties. This avoids future challenges arising due to differing recollections because of faded memories. For me this is a wise and practical matter especially since the pace of business is quite rapid and sometimes I have trouble remembering what I did last week never mind the complexities of a negotiation that happened 6, 12, 18 months of more ago.
On the flip side, don’t be so “melancholy” in your dealings that your written agreement brings undone the negotiated deal because someone has not accurately reflected the spirit of the negotiations in the written document.
Final comment:
In the real world the negotiation process is quite fluid and can move between fast paced and slow moving for a range of reasons. Without becoming paranoid a good negotiator will learn to read signals on many different levels always with a view to concluding a beneficial deal for all parties.
That said given each negotiation has at least two negotiators it is important to recognise when to walk away. Perhaps the other negotiator has a “scarcity” mentality (instead of “abundance” mentality) and in that case they will be thinking in terms of “they win” and “you lose”. Personally I choose not to deal with these types of people (unless they demonstrate a willingness to change) because that win lose philosophy often pervades everything else they do. | 
